A Penny for Your Thoughts: Remember, Fiction isn’t Real

couple reading in bed

I decided after a few interactions and conversations, it was time for a reminder. I want you to say this out loud: Fiction isn’t real. Go ahead, say it with me: Fiction isn’t Real.

This shouldn’t be something I have to say here, being as everything on this website from my name to my stories is fiction.

Now, my posts about writing and so forth, experiences I’ve had in my real life, etc. – that is real.

However… my fictional stories are just that – absolute fiction.

It’s my mind that’s smutty.

Not dirty, not filthy, not shameful. Smutty. Sex-Positive.

I mean, hell, I just recently started dating again after several years of not dating or having a sexual partner of any kind. (You know, a soul in a meat suit, not BOBs aka battery operated boyfriends) Kind of difficult to be living my writing without needing people, am I right?

You know I live on Twitter, so much of me is there. I share all the thoughts and ideas that come to me there. Also, I retweet the people who make me think, make me laugh, or share good information on how to do a thing. And, of course, I support people who are supportive of others in a positive way.

While my fictional writing life has been on an unwanted hiatus with fits and starts over the past two and a half years, I’ve also grown in other ways.

I’m the Quiet Cohost on #TheSexualitySpace hosted by Dr. J. on Twitter. I’m her virtual assistant (and occasional tech support). We brainstorm together, we laugh and cry together. We read each other’s writing and give constructive feedback (or just look for those dang typos).

The adventures with Big Blue and #DildoShenanigans is so much fun, but the #DatingProfileShenanigans is where the commentary flies. I cannot make this stuff up!

I’m working on building my own side business. I’m looking for clients who want a website, but don’t want to build it (looking at you authors). I am trying to do the thing that will get me what I really want: the freedom to work for myself and thrive, not just survive.

But finding out that people think that my real life reflects the fictional stories written here is, as usual, disheartening.

While there are some stories I would wholeheartedly loved to experience, none of it is true. I mean, maybe .002% comes from personal emotional remembrance. How a certain thing made me shiver or twitch or roll my eyes back in my head.

No one in the world reads Stephen King and thinks it’s based on his real life.

Did you read that famous BDSM Trilogy and think “wow, that author’s sex life is out of this world!”? No. You didn’t.

Do you know how often Laurell K. Hamilton is approached and asked if her sex life is like Anita Blake’s or if her partner is aware of her cheating ways?

Way too often, erotica and romance authors (if their writing includes scenes with sex) are subjected to one of two boxes: the butt of the joke or trashy nymphomaniacs.

And we are all tired of it.

Sex sells, or so they say. Unfortunately, writing about it can become a nightmare.

Authors choose to write under pen names because they don’t want to be harassed or stalked. And yet, we get asked for nudes or sex because well, that’s what we write about and we must want that kind of attention.

And that isn’t even half of it. We have predators who pose as female or female-presenting erotica authors in order to gain our trust. Eventually, we find out they weren’t female, or female-presenting, but a man wanting to take advantage of erotica authors trust and vulnerability.

And you know what? Some erotica authors do enjoy that kind of attention and may even encourage it. It might inspire them to write, but remember, this is a ‘not all’ category. I tend to flirt with the people who interact with me on a regular basis after I get to know them. I’ve made some amazing friends and I wouldn’t want any misunderstandings to come between us.

Just don’t get offended if you ask an erotica author to do something like send nudes or have sex and you get blocked….

I’m a real human being with real human feelings behind the pen name.

So, one more time for those who missed it.

Fiction. Isn’t. Real.

And, remember, that author who writes those oh so steamy scenes with sex… may end up being somehow related to you. So, be careful what you say on the internet. It can come back to bite you in the ass. (No, no one related to me – that I know of – has been inappropriate to me on the internet… but, seriously… we all hide behind an avatar.)


Chemical [se]X 2 Just One More Cover
Chemical se[X] 2: Just One More Cover

Happy Valentine’s Day! Did you forget to buy your loved one something special? We’ve got you covered!

Gift them an ebook version of Chemical [se]X 2: Just One More and snuggle up in bed for some steamy hot reads!

Not sure about this anthology? Read reviews, interviews, and more on the info page.


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