5 Things I Love About “How to Build a Sex Room”

If you haven’t yet watched How to Build a Sex Room on Netflix yet… don’t fret, there are no real spoilers.

How to Build a Sex Room Netflix Logo via IMDB

Overall, I enjoyed watching How to Build a Sex Room. It felt so good seeing happy couples, a lovely polycule, and an amazing single person discussing their sex lives, desires and fears. I hope in sharing these vulnerabilities with the world it helps others learn to do the same in their relationships.

Five: The Sex Rooms

I loved most (not all) of the rooms created for the people interviewed for the show. There is no way in hell you’re getting me to go into a basement through a trap door. Nope. NOT happening. A couple of the rooms, which were also the bedrooms the people would be sleeping in, were very busy and had a lot going on.

Personally, sleeping in a room with many shiny objects or surfaces that reflect light might prove difficult for me to sleep in.

I preferred the sex rooms that were separate from the bedroom meant to sleep in, simply because you know if you’re going in there, it’s [hopefully] for sexy times.

Also, I decided that I want a soaking tub because the apartment tub/shower combo is just a real pain in the neck. And back.

Four: The Hostess


Melanie is the absolute best. I enjoyed the playful rapport between her and her contractor Mike. It was fanfreakingtastic. It felt like they’d been doing this forever together.

She knows what she knows and hot damn, she knew what the people wanted. I honestly hope there is another season to this that maybe follows up with the people in season one. I’d love to see that they’re doing amazing.

Three: The People

I honestly did not expect a diverse show. I am so glad I was wrong.

From a divorced woman exploring her new found sexual freedoms, to a poly family, to a couple who live in a van, and more. Everyone on the show is absolutely fantastic.

The simple fact that they agreed to go on a show and share their sexual desires and fears with the world when it’s constantly shaming sexual education, positivity, and freedoms, is brave as fuck.

Two: All. The. Toys.

This mannequin bound in rope was added to one of the sex rooms.

All. The. Sex. Toys. And the conversations about the toys. And the educational field trips to learn about using the toys. Seeing some of the couples utilize a sex couch while being directed into different positions was both hot and sweet. You could see how well they connected to each other while exploring different ways they can enjoy one another.

Seeing someone learn that they aren’t the dominant they thought they were was eye opening. Watching people being bound in rope or cuffed to the St. Andrews Cross just fueled the feels about these couples doing the work to include new things in their relationship.

It wasn’t about spicing it up either. Sure, someone used those words, but it turned out to be so much more.

One: The Honest Conversations

If you don’t follow me on Twitter (drink) then you probably don’t know about The Sexuality Space hosted by my partner in smut, Dr. J. We’re always shouting to the people that having honest and open conversations about sex can be hard, but doing the hard work is what creates a stronger connection with your partner(s).

Watching the people open up to learn new things about themselves and their partners is truly heart-warming. Maybe there’s hope out there yet that we can make love and not war someday.

Even if you’re not of the kinky persuasion, I highly recommend watching How to Build a Sex Room. And you might enjoy watching The Principles of Pleasure and Sex, Explained on Netflix as well.

We are humans, and even if we don’t engage in sexual activities, we’re beings who should understand how our bodies work at the very least.

What are your favorite things/people/moments in How to Build a Sex Room?

Join Dr. J. this Wednesday at Noon Eastern for #TheSexualitySpace on Twitter to discuss How to Build a Sex Room!

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